Tickle v. Tackle - The Sculpted Pompadours of LA

DC United

Tickle - Not content to allow the blogosphere to destroy one player at a time, Kyle Sheldon cries havoc and lets slip the blogs of war upon the entire club! Kidding, kidding, of course. Behind the Badge looks like a great addition to the party. Fair warning though--behindthebadge.com ≠ behindthebadge.net . . .

Tackle - Oh CONCACRAP Champions' Cup! Yet another semifinal iceberg comes floating in from Mexico way. On the wrong side of the 2-0 divide, will United have enough in their locker to overcome the deficit in the home leg? Not unless the finishing improves dramatically, and Wells keeps out the counter chances that are sure to come . . .


Tickle - I'm not really sold on the whole promotion/relegation deal working for MLS, but wouldn't it just warm the cockles of your heart to see Alexi's ship going down? Xavier and Ruiz tossing developmental players to the sharks, climbing up the masts, trying to maintain their sculpted pompadours, while Beckham manfully tries to fend the beasts off, but his anachronistic gladiator S&M gear keeps getting in the way. And Donovan? Oh yeah, he's up in the crow's nest, catching some rays and rambling on about how great the weather in Cali is, and dear God, but isn't Germany a miserable, cold, and damp sort of hell?

Tackle - Ahem--see Salazar, Ricardo. Take note, sir, that you are not allowed to wrap your arms around a player and drag him to the ground in futbol. American football, yes . . . football in the rest of the world, no. Perhaps you were confused by the minor league ballpark you found yourself trotting about in and had a flash of good ol' fashion Americana--pickups, hot dogs, apple pie, and big guys in helmets and pads wrestling each other to the ground? Hmmm, on second though, maybe Becks' gladiator gear isn't totally out of context . . .

The Prem

Tickle - Holy crap, but did you see that 10-man Arsenal comeback against Bolton? I'm sitting there composing my "ode to a season lost", ready to give Arsenal a drubbing for failing to keep pace with United and make the Prem finish something truly exciting and special, when the Gunners finally snap their draw-streak in dramatic fashion. Unfortunately . . .

Tackle - It's too little, too late. What promised to become a three-horse race is starting to fade into the distance. United are too deep, too talented, and too ruthless. You can't even claim that the Champions' League will prove a distraction since all three of said horses (ManU, Chelsea, and Arsenal) are still running that race as well. United still have a relatively difficult run-in, and both Chelsea and Arsenal will get a chance at them over the final matches, but unless something as dramatic as Arsenal's second-half resurrection against Bolton occurs, the fat lady has sung, changed into her street mumu, hailed a taxi, and is on her way to a late-night dinner engagement . . .

Down on the other end of the ladder, Fulhamerica can just about pack their bags for the Fizzy Soda Pop League after dropping two vital points at Derby. So close they were to grabbing all three, but alas 'twas not to be. So will the Americans flee the sinking Cottage in the summer, scampering rat-like down the mooring lines in search of a more Prem-worthy vessel?


  1. As for United: PUT CARVALLO IN.

    As for los Gunnerzz: be jealous...

    As for that appalling institution of the Galaxy: HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA....

    My 'tickle' is currently the Fenerbahce rally vs Chelsea hahahaaaaaa....Chelsea can never be too humiliated in my eyes...

    My 'tackle' is Cezar not making DCU (I like depth especially Brazilian teenage depth) as well as stupid Liverpoo equalizing 3 minutes after Arsenal started beating them--and dang you Bendtner!!!!!!!

  2. Galaxy's attack... actually looked pretty good against San Jose. But then again, the Baltimore Orioles might even look good against San Jose too.

  3. @c-l: I don't think Cezar failed to make the team. I believe the issue was that the reason he'd be coming on loan would be playing time, but he'd be #5 on the forward depth chart. You do the math.

    @shatz I suspected that the Gals would be dangerous in attack, it's the other side of the ball I'm worried about. Of course, I'm not in the minority on that one ;-). I only saw highlights of the SJ match, which were restricted (of course) to Lando + Becks. I'd be interested (if you'd care to comment) on what the Gals looked like defensively and what percentage of possession you'd estimate that they had.

  4. I only watched the first half, but possession wasn't as one-sided as you might guess. San Jose did fairly well in the back and midfield, but lacked the pass to put their forwards in good scoring position. Very few legitimate scoring opportunities, but that may have been more due to SJ's ineffectiveness than LA's defense. The Galaxy probably could have won 4-0 if Alan Gordon had any noticeable talent.

  5. true. being the fifth forward is an 'ick' situation. good to keep in mind for next season or future seasons, though. (moreno aging, niell flopping)

  6. That's about what I expected, Shatz. The Quakes (on paper) look like a side that should be organized and pretty handy defensively. I wonder if Glinton and Kamara, for all their physical gifts, have the ability to find (or create) space for themselves.