That other United smashed the Gunners handily in the FA Cup, led by Nani dishing up the balls for Darren Fletcher to nod home. Beat by the head of Darren freakin' Fletcher? That's gotta smart for Arsene's Gunner garçons--though Fletcher does have a tendency to stick his big tartan noggin in when it counts. Let the mind games begin in the race for the Premier League crown! . . . Ha, ha, ha, ha (wipes tear away). The drama goes on between the Metrobulls and that Windy City Burning Sensation. How freakin' outstanding does the United front office look with these clowns getting bullied by players, swinging handbags at each other, offering up players "not for sale", and generally looking ridiculous? . . . The UEFA Champions' League knockout round first legs were, by and large, fantastic watching with some truly outstanding goals. But--please, please, please tell me that we can't end up with a Milan-Chelsea final. Please? . . . MLS Philadelphia, anyone? Yes, sir--sign me up! Maybe United will finally have a competitive Mid-Atlantic rival now.
Now, I only saw highlights of the Inter-Liverpool Champions' League throwdown, but I almost stood and cheered when that cretin Materazzi was sent off. Between him and his Liverpool counterpart Jamie Carragher, you've got the makings of what could possibly be my Most Hated center back pairing. Snarling pair of back-alley hackmongering villains--they'd get on like a house afire with MLS Thug-strordinaire Jay Heaps. Sure they've got that . . . what's it called? Determination! Right--they've got determination [to be complete pricks--ed.]. But Carragher--in true Heaps fashion--has bloody little else (you just had to trot out the Albionism, didn't you, you pretentious sod!), and Materazzi deserves to see red in every game just by virtue of being such a spectacular jackass . . . News out of DC United pre-season camp says that the Bard is close to signing on the dotted line with United. Here's hoping! With Carroll-the-middling-son out 4-6 months and Olsen on the shelf, that leaves what manner of Plan B at d-mid should Simms go down or face suspension? Ugh, it's waaaaay too early to be worried about crap like this. JACOBSONNNNNN!!! . . . The Galaxatives drop a steaming turd (love the pic of a bemused Becks--obviously in awe of the talent arrayed around him) in the Pan-Galactic Ultimate Smackdown Challenge Cup-League-Shootout, or whatever it's called. Meanwhile, the Dynamo chug right along into the final. A sign of things to come for the season ahead?