As I prep the homestead for the impending deluge of snow and ice that we're supposedly soon to be buried under, I thought I'd take a quick jaunt through the news, spider-like, drawing the tenuous strands of DC United news together to weave my own twisted (and quite deadly!) web. All set?
Flying Gonzalos Not Yet Free?
I've been pretty much resigned to the fact that the Flying Gonzalos were out of the picture completely, but Ives has us shopping them (without much interest) around MLS. I wonder if some front office might yet be tempted. Seattle? They need defenders. New York? Osorio's shipped out his last crop of Sudamericanos, maybe he wants more? Dallas? It's tough to see us landing anything, though if reports of Dax McCarty being shopped are not exaggerated, I wouldn't mind us trying to make that deal happen. Mike Randolph, potentially in LA's shop window, would be useful depth on the left flank as well as bringing some desperately needed (gasp!) speed.
Apparently, things didn't quite work out for United draft-defector Andrew Jacobson in France. So he's off to Denmark. I guess Norway is out, and Denmark is in as the hot, hot, hot destination for those trying to avoid dying of hunger when their MLS salary can't cover the groceries. Looks like Marcus Tracy is off the market as well, preventing United from wasting a pick on a Euro-bound collegian (again!). Ah well, at least he'll be wearing some nice threads.
Got An Hour Or So To Kill?
Then you might be interested in watching the trainwreck that is Paul Gascoigne's life. Remember when United were linked to Gazza not so many years ago? I suppose that puts the Great Sudamericano Fiasco of 2008 in perspective doesn't it?
Does that hit a little too close for comfort, United fans? Though I have to say, out of the selections on offer, it's probably the best of a decidedly Euro-snobbish lot. Still . . . the U-Derby (UnDerby?) has potential appeal. Certainly more than that Terence-Trent Derby. Man, those folks in Terence and Trent really hate each other, don't they? That fight over the wishing well really got out of hand . . .
US Camp Damaging the MLS Goods?
Now we're getting really tangential, since, as you know, MLS bylaws prohibit United from having anybody involved in the US National Team picture (I kid, I kid). As it stands, it looks like another MLS injury has cropped up with Geoff Cameron being returned to Houston courtesy of the Bum Hammy Hammer. Bradley's also managed to ding Chad Marshall and Stuart Holden as well, and Dom Kinnear must be wondering if he ought to pull Chinger out of camp as a precaution.
Alright, we now return you to your regularly scheduled program. Good luck to any of you out there that happen to be in the path of the projected storm that'll be paying me a call this weekend. Thoughts on the news or the weather?