Call the Headsman | a DC United Match Reaction

So, does anybody think that Kevin Payne can smell the coffee yet? It's been about a month to a month and a half (at the very least) since the rest of North America conceded that United were never going to make the playoffs. Which is not to say that the team is completely hopeless. Indeed, in most phases of the game, United matched a very good RSL side.

The big problem? In the phases that matter most in the game of soccer—scoring goals and keeping them out—DC United flat out sucks. Ergo, the wrong side of a 3-0.

Tell me, how much is it again that we pay Perkins? And for that matter...remember what we gave up in order to pay him as much as we do? Can we agree that Hamid should start the rest of the season? Sure he'll make mistakes born of youth, but he'll also make saves and benefit from the experience, and that's more than you can say for Perkins at the moment. I still think Perkins might crawl out the other end of this nightmare and still be a reasonable MLS keeper. But that's all he is, and anybody who thinks any different...is probably in the DC United front office (buh-dum-dum, I'll be here all week folks!).

Of course, he had a back line arrayed ahead of him that should probably be plying its trade a division lower (James excepted...perhaps), so that didn't help matters. Another one to lay at the feet of both FO and training staff (who may have lost another couple of soldiers today). Anybody seen that infamous letter from the ownership promising accountability?

Anybody? Anybody? Beuler?

You know what? I was going to add a whole riff here about some of the promising attacking play but pathetic lack of speed and quality and runs that might benefit from said play, but it all seems so pointless. It's the same riff, week in and week out. We're toothless. Hernandez and Boskovic both look like they can contribute, given time, but we have nothing up top to take advantage of their contributions, and, more importantly, we have no time left for those contributions to matter, save perhaps in the Open Cup (Hello Egg Deployment Team, there's your rather small and ragged basket. Have at it!).

Watching Simms limp off and Tino tweak his ankle in the dying minutes, watching Talley labor to haul his ancient ass around the pitch and then bitch at the refs like it's their fault he's slow and mis-times tackles, wondering that a seventeen year old is the thing most worth watching on this miserable trainwreck, pitying Jaime that he's past it and that he has to bow out like this after such a tremendous career...it's all more comedy than tragedy now, and we're getting our just desserts for mocking the misery of the Crimson Cows last year. Painful as it may seem, we should emulate their model this off-season, if not earlier...

Let some big heads roll. Excise the dead wood as deep as the blade will cut and burn the lot of it. Accountability time is past due and so is the headsman.

Anybody think he'll show?

Me neither.

Ugh.