Smooth Operators, 24/7

Okay. So have we all had a chance to let Wednesday's moderately good feelings wash away? Let's get down to brass tacks and see what our "working 24/7" FO has been up to...

Emilio? Really? After continuously insisting you didn't want him back? And do we really need another one-trick pony in the stable? I realize that we're short of fit attackers at the moment, but to these jaded eyes, it matters not a wit who's standing around up top (operative phrase when it comes to Emilio, n'est pas?) if you don't have the horses to win the midfield battle and provide the chances.

Oh wait!

Here comes Stephen King. Fine. He can fill some holes (and we're nothing if not full of holes), but can I point out what we traded to get him? A second round pick. For a guy who's done squat-all since 2008 and hasn't seen the field for Sigi this year. Sure, maybe he rediscovers his mojo and does a job for us, but do you really need to give up a second-round pick for a guy that doesn't seem to feature in your trading partner's plans at all?

24/7, baby!

I realize, of course, that outside the transfer windows our options are limited and that our injury crisis is very real, so I don't begrudge the necessity of picking up what scraps we can. Still, don't these moves smack of desperate grasping at straws and/or furious backpedaling on the FO's part?

Hard to fault them for what seems to be their prime competency these days.

If A Tree Falls In An Empty RFK...? | a DC United Match Reaction

I'm sure you'll forgive me for placing little weight on the fact that our half-scrubs beat the half-scrubs of the last place team in the Western Conference (to our Eastern Conference cellar dwelling) and consequently won't be spending much time on the reaction post. With that said, is there anything that we can take from this match? I'll try to tease out a few questions...

Formation Change?

United ran out in what looked suspiciously like the 4-2-3-1 I employed so successfully in my DCU|FM Challenge. I'm curious as to whether this was enforced by our lack of fit forwards or reflects a larger shift on Onalfo's part. Whatever the case, there were patches, mostly early in the second half, where United were able to string together some pretty sequences of possession. Key to those sequences were the mobility of the attacking line, particularly Cristman in the lone-wolf role up top. When he pulled wide or dropped deep, allowing the three in support to flood into dangerous spots, United did something that it has been struggling mightily to do in league play: cause discomfort for the opposition's defense. 

That said, I was disappointed that we didn't control possession better. True, Dallas had equal numbers in midfield, but there were large chunks of the match, particularly in the first half, where the ball didn't seem to leave United's end. But for a handful of wasted finishes by the Dallas front-runners, this could have been a very different story.

Najar-velous?

Sorry, had to do it. The kid looked good floating beneath Cristman, combining with the latter on two goals. While the chip into space for Cristman's opener was the highlight of the first half, his persistance in chasing defenders and confidence to run at them when in possession (best moment: Najar strips the ball in midfield and charges immediately into attack, splitting three Dallas defenders before one of them knocks the ball loose. Cristman, trailing the run, fires over from distance) belied his tender years. Not that we can hitch our wagon to a 17-year old, pray for the best, and hope somehow to make the playoffs, but the kid definitely deserves serious minutes, and he took his goal well.

Happy Now?

With Perkins' struggles early this season, much has been made of the fact that both Hartman and Busch, solid, reliable MLS veteran netminders, became available shortly thereafter and would have come much cheaper than Fred + a first-rounder + cash. Hartman certainly didn't make the United FO question their decision in this match. He gifted Castillo the soft second and charged out to flap at Cristman's header for United's decisive fourth. 

As for Perkins? He made a couple of good stops, but still showed a bit of hesitation in controlling his box and clearing balls. I'd expected Hamid to get a look in this match and wonder if starting Perkins was a confidence move on Onalfo's part. Here's hoping the win gave him some, because our defense doesn't look like it's going to shut down anybody anytime soon.

Conclusions?

I hesitate, as I said, to put too much weight on this performance. We'll get a much fairer picture this weekend when the Bulls come knocking. In the meantime, I'm left wondering if United's success in non-televised, sparsely attended matches thus far (Carolina Cup + Open Cup qualifier) reflects an inability to handle the intensity a packed house brings or demonstrates our current level of quality (USL2 Charleston, TFC and Dallas at the wrong end of the MLS table and likely to stay there, RSL struggling out of the gate). Food for thought.

Et tu?

ROFL Cause It Hurts Too Much to Cry

Lest you think the delusion parade has been cancelled by the FO, I bring you...

Mister Dave Kasper!

We know we are 0-4; we're not an 0-4 team. 

Um...yes. Yes you are. You've assembled a toothless attack, can't keep the team healthy, and assigned a semi-competent manager who can't organize a defense to steer the ship. When your only two goals have come via gifts from the expansion team, you haven't let in less than two in any game (including three against the aforementioned expansion team that doesn't seem to boast much of an attack), and you have not a point on the season, I think the evidence is fairly obvious.

We will look to strengthen the side, but at the same time, we believe in the players who are here.

So...which is it? And if it really is the latter, I have to say: (1) not surprised given your track record and (2) are you freakin' blind? There are bigger holes in this roster than injury alone can account for.

The next transfer window is in July; that's the first time to go out and get international players, so we have players that we have had our eyes on, continue to track and something that we will spend a lot of time with in the next several months.

Pardon my skepticism, but your acquisitions haven't exactly been blowing the doors off of late. I eagerly anticipate our new 38 year-old playmaker from the depths of the Scottish third division. I'm sure he'll light things up for 30 minutes until the Bum Hammy Hammer gets him. Speaking of which...

We have had a history of hamstrings.

Ya think? You ever consider...you know...maybe that signals that something might be wrong with the fitness staff?

I think Curt has done a good job. He has been hamstrung with missing big pieces

First of all...pass me some of what you're smoking, must be some quality stuff. And second...HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! "Hamstrung"? Oh, that's rich. Irony, thy name is Kasper. Oh, and third, injury alone doesn't explain the "big pieces" Onalfo is missing. Not that it would matter, in my opinion, but you didn't exactly give him a full deck to work with.

And how about the man with the plan himself? Problems with mood and morale?

No. It's not even a concern.

Dude, I know I'm not in the locker room with the guys like you are, but give me a freakin' break! Did you see the looks on your guys' faces as Chicago rolled them over last time out? Which step is "denial" again?

You guys in the press are going to make it out to be the absolute worst and it's only going to have to make us be stronger. I will confront whatever gets thrown our way and we will find a way to get better.

Um...it's not just the press, Curt. Good luck with finding your "way" (you're going to need it).

Deja Vu All Over Again | a DC United Match Reaction

Wait, wait, wait--stop me if you've heard this one before. United keeps the ball in their opponent's end for much of the match without ever looking truly dangerous. The opposition, when they do have the ball, go right for the juglar and make United look worryingly inept, managing more and better chances than we do with all our precious possession. Then, roundabout 75 minutes, the visitors kick it up a gear and United are suddenly wounded, a puzzled, haunted expression plastered on their faces. And it's only a matter of time before the coup de grâce arrives in comical fashion.

Welcome, my friends, to the Curt Onalfo era...

Well, let's not blame it all on Onalfo; there's a fair bit of blame to be shared around here, particularly by the FO that's built this team. Are there really enough dangerous pieces here for Onalfo to fashion something threatening that might offset his inability to organize a defense? Moreno had his moments, but there's no way he's a starter anymore, much less a 90 minute player (Can somebody explain why he was left on the field all 90 when he was clearly done? Is Onalfo afraid to yank him?). Castillo looked a little better than in previous outings, but didn't ever really look dangerous. And Allsopp? Square peg in a round hole. He just doesn't seem to be playing the same game as the rest of the team: flicks to non-existent runners, dribbling into blind alleys. And how about the big deal that was supposed to solve that looming problem in net...?

Perkins looks utterly lost. He's tentative coming for crosses, gets all confused with his defenders when looking to clear, and what about that second goal? Sure, Talley was doing his best traffic cone impersonation (and had been all night) against McBride...but beaten near post on a flick-on header from a keeper's dead ball clearance from his own end? Really? This is worth a first round pick and a starting attacking midfielder (you don't think Fred could start on this train wreck?). Jeebus! It's no wonder we can't get a stadium built with smooth operators like this at the helm.

Of course, Perkins' giant pile of suck was perfectly in keeping with the quality of his defense. I don't know if they were just being gun-shy about making tackles in their defensive third because of the stunning number of terrible free kick opportunities we gave up last week by being too aggressive, but the inability to close down angles, close down players, and clear balls in and around the box was enough to make you weep. For crap's sake, Collins John was playing alone up top for the Fire and he consistently had time and space in which to operate without having to drop deep. That's pathetic. Sure, sure, I know we were without our starting center backs, but...ugh!

Still, the thought that sticks in my mind comes courtesy of the Fire color guy (electrical difficulties last night meant I had to watch the replay this morning on Match Day Live), who said, as the match began, "DC United are pointless this season."

Spot on in so many ways. We are still without a single point on the table, which was what he meant in the first place. But we also lack any sort of cutting edge that might threaten an opponent (our only goals came courtesy of defensive errors by the expansion team). Worst of all? We don't seem to have any direction. Possessing the ball is nice, but it means squat without creating chances or being able to limit the opposition's chances. The only time we managed to look mildly threatening was from one free kick and a couple of corners. And our defense, as previously pointed out, doesn't seem to have a clue.

We may recover somewhat as the injured start filing back onto the pitch (of course, seeing the Bum Hammy Hammer strike down yet another player [Pontius], we may need a revolving door installed in the treatment room), and maybe there will be some movement in the transfer market this summer that adds a bit of quality if Chang decides he's seen enough of the Kasper-Payne Comedy Hour. But at the moment, I think we need to set ourselves a pretty low bar.

How about beating the points total for the 2009 Red Bulls? At the moment, that looks like it might be a stretch...

Ugh.

Dear MLSsoccer.com

(1) MLS = Major League Soccer, not Most League Soccer. I have no problem with you covering Americans abroad or other leagues in general, though neither would seem to fall under the purview of a league web site, but please keep such news in its own section. Why am I seeing stories about Roma and Manchester United under the heading "MLS News"? When I visit the official mouthpiece of MLS, I want to see news about MLS. I know. It's a shocking idea.

(2) Regarding highlights. I like the idea of pumping out the "condensed" matches on Match Day Live, now that you're actually getting somewhat timely about it, but I'm still only seeing five of the weekend's eight matches available today. Here's hoping that'll get better as the kinks get worked out, but in the meantime, you've already got "highlights" posted for the other matches with the game recaps, so why not have a Highlights tab in addition to the Live, Condensed, and Archive ones that serves those same streams? Would that be so hard?

(3) Who's Le Roux? Once is a slip.

Twice is pathetic (note the actual text of the article is correct...Vive L'Editor!).

Even better? Try clicking the headline or the "read more" links for that latter story...

Weak sauce, folks. I'm not sure which is the bigger failure thus far this season, DC United or MLSsoccer.com.

Can't Resist

Now, I know my buddy Shatz over at Black & Red United will turn up to lecture me on the virtues of supporting the team in their time of need rather than relentlessly heckling them, but...can't resist...must pervert...his effort...

Allsopp's a bust, Castillo too
Kasper and Payne are rolling gutterballs most ev'ry time
There's something that Will Chang must do
Toss out the bums and start anew

Feel free to indulge should your current state of disillusion require catharsis, and know that I did manage to resist posting a version that includes seppuku, which rhymes nicely as well...

Despair, Part III | a DC United Match Reaction

"Look on my works, ye once-mighty, and despair." 
     - Onalfomandias

Sure, there was a fightback, aided mightily by a fidgety Union defense and some shocking goalkeeping, but shipping three goals to a brand-spanking new expansion team has to have even the most "glass half full" amongst the punditry sharpening their knives. There are three really big questions that I'd like to have answered...

1. Did Onalfo see enough evidence from Tino in wide areas that he's going to make a shift to a two-holder midfield with Tino either wide or tucked beneath a lone striker? There were still gaps with Barklage and Morsink, neither of whom is a reliable ball-winner in midfield, but the space and freedom that was afforded, both in the wide areas and beneath Allsopp, certainly made a difference to our attacking threat. I'm going to just float this out there though I know some will disagree vehemently: I don't mind Morsink, though I'd rather have him paired with a dynamic ball-winner. Though his defensive effort is often ineffective and he does have a tendency to cough up the ball in uncomfortable areas, his range of passing and vision are still evident.
2. Does anybody in the brain-trust have a clue about how to organize a defense? Even before the prospective "general," Pena, limped off (Bum Hammy Hammer, making its presence felt), we looked completely out of sorts, leaving massive gaps, committing a string of stupid, stupid, and even-more unbelievably stupid fouls in dangerous areas, and affording the Union far too much time and space in midfield. And how about that marking on the first goal? Oh wait...what marking? Jakovic seems to be hitting the sophomore slump with relish.
3. When does Kasper get the bullet? I don't know if Castillo is just used to a slower game, but he certainly doesn't look like much of an upgrade over Fred on the left side of midfield. And Allsopp? He had one decent chance, but I didn't see much else from him that makes me think he's going to even hit the 10-goal mark. Carey Talley? A cruel, cruel joke.

Some other thoughts...

* I wonder if it's time to give Graye/Adams a run at left back. Wallace certainly looks a dangerous player with the ball at his feet, running at defenders in their own half, even if he tends to cut back and slow things down too often. But in his own half? Lumped balls to nowhere. Acres of space waiting to be exploited. Burchie? Is that you in disguise? With experience, maybe he'll learn to distribute and defend, but at the moment, I think he's more of an asset on the left wing, certainly more than Castillo is. And yes, I'm fully aware that I've been calling for Wallace to get a solid run at left back. Caveat emptor, dear reader. It won't be the last time.

* Terry Vaughn had an even more puzzling array of decisions than he normally does. I'm not going to apportion too much blame here since both teams were stuck with his baffling inconsistency (letting hard fouls go and then carding a player less than a minute later for a more innocuous challenge, for example), but Philly did seem to get a fair amount of home-field "assistance," even over-riding linesmen much closer to the action than he was.

* Julius James is a red card waiting to happen. When he wasn't busy laying out our own guys, his flying elbows had me convinced that he would walk sooner rather than later, particularly with a flopador of the class Alejandro Moreno belongs to on the field.

* Credit where credit's due. The Union's second on the counter was a tremendous bit of play that exposed us horribly. Of course, I also thought that Castillo, playing cover at the midfield stripe, was supposed to have wheels. Live and learn, I suppose.

* I still don't see enough movement off the ball. We play a static, passive game, waiting for gaps rather than taking the initiative and forcing them to open. 

* Our crosses in the second half were better, particularly since Pontius was in position to do what he does so well: arrive late. In the first half, they were a useless series of aimless balls to motionless targets. 

* Hmmm. An expansion team plays with more togetherness and understanding of each other's movement and tendencies than we do. Awesome!

* Moreno was much more effective coming on as a sub.

So where to from here? There's still time to pull out of this tail-spin. I seem to recall Soehn finally realizing he couldn't play three at the back a couple of years ago after a few poor results, and the team stringing together a hot streak that ended in a Supporters' Shield. Not that I think we'll be able to do the same (still holding out hope, Shatz?), but a playoff spot shouldn't be an unrealistic goal...yet. But there need to be some serious changes in how this team plays before that becomes a possibility. Does Onalfo have the chops to implement them?

Sadly, I'm not sure he does. At least he made reasonably effective changes in this game, so there's one tiny glimmer for the unrepentantly optimistic among you to pin your hopes to. For my part..?

Ugh.

(You had to know that was coming...)

Oh the Humanity! | a DC United Match Reaction

There were some positives. Let's get that out of the way first. Back in the friendly confines of RFK, United controlled both pace and possession. They looked much more assured defensively with Pena directing traffic at the back. There was even, for the first 20 minutes or so, a degree of urgency and commitment that was sadly lacking last week. And yet...

And yet the scoreboard still reads 2-0 to the team even more dinged up than us. Nicol is a master at getting the most from what little he has to work with, but he sure had some help. Talking points?

I have a few...

* Five and five makes squat. It took until what, the 65th or 70th minute before we started to see some overlapping play from the fullbacks? We defended with five, attacked with five. Those familiar with the English game would have seen some eerie similarities between this game and the way a similarly stagnant and structured Liverpool struggles against the likes of Stoke. New England were disciplined, United predictable. Our five attackers were able to create little against a compact, organized defense. With neither speed on the front line or width in the attack, it was far too comfortable for the Revs. We had some chances, yes, but considering the possession we enjoyed, we had far too few for my liking.

* The Soehn Plan. The biggest problem I always had with Soehn was how limited he was during the game. He could get the team into leads, but his inability to make tactical adjustments or effective substitutions consistently led to lost leads and predictable collapses. Can we just take a moment to look at what the two coaches achieved with their substitutions? Nicol brought on Mansally and got two goals from him. Onalfo brought on (1) Boyzzz, who did jack all but cut the ball inside and fire balls into masses of bodies. This is the best we can manage off the bench when we need a goal? Followed by (2) a 17-year old kid who, while he did show a couple of moves and (gasp!) made himself available for balls sprayed wide, had about the same effect as Boyzzz. And (3) Julius James, while he got into attacking positions better than any of the other fullbacks in black, didn't close down Tierney quickly enough, allowing the cross that opened the Revs' account. Nicol 2, Onalfo -1.

* The trouble with Tino. Please, please, please, for the love of God, get him wide! Or, baring that, pair him with Pontius up top (yes, I said it, I don't think Moreno should be starting) and let's get some movement to put a little doubt in defenses. In the second half, I noticed him only on free kicks and that one little burst where he actually got a shot on goal. True, he was desperately close to scoring from a free kick in the first half, but he would have been taking that kick as a winger too. But where was he for big stretches when we needed to start generating chances? Get him wide. Get him space. My suggestion? Barklage was pretty average in the second half, but he really started to come on in the second half, notably playing some nice touches in tight spaces along the right flank and hitting a few measured passes to spring attacking players. How about playing Barklage as a deeper central midfielder beside Morsink to mask the latter's pedestrian defensive efforts, thus allowing the wings to play higher and with the freedom to cut inside and confuse defenses?

* A mixed bag. Such are our winter signings. Pena was impressive, both in organizing the defense and distributing. But Castillo was well-nigh invisible, save for when he was playing the ball backward or meandering infield, which wouldn't be so bad if he was doing it higher up the pitch. Perkins had little chance on the goals. Allsopp? I'll stand by the prediction I've made all along: flop, flop, flop.

* What master plan? I generally have no problem with United playing a slightly slower game, particularly when we're controlling possession. But to do so and remain dangerous requires the sort of string-pullers and movement that we lack. This was the heart of my plea yesterday for attacking play that had everybody on the same page and not even needing to think about where to get the ball next. Instead we're treated to the same glacial buildup as last year. Ping, ping, ping, turnover. There is nobody that looks ready to hit the killer ball, and nobody making the runs ahead of him to make such a ball worthwhile in any case. That's not to say that we didn't have good passages of play. Those were certainly on offer. The problem is that they all too often end in either a snatched chance or a loss of possession. Where are the quality chances and the finishers to take advantage? Where are the extra bodies to stretch defenses?

Of course, all of this is made to look much worse by those two late Mansally goals. As the game staggered toward what seemed to be an inevitable 0-0 finish, I did find signs of hope. We controlled the ball, had our moments from set pieces (why is Barklage our danger-man from corners again?), looked pretty assured (though still too casual at times) at the back, and even created a handful of attacking plays that seemed to carry a threat until the finish or final ball eluded us. If this had ended 0-0, my response would have been, "not quite there yet, but building something; let's get a box-to-box bustler who can win balls and distribute, free the wings to push higher with more freedom, and take our chances." But now...

But now I look at our shortcomings on the bench, our lack of pace and movement up top, our inability to stretch play vertically or horizontally, and wonder. Are we just missing that one final stroke that completes the picture of a playoff-bound side? Or are we bearing a palette that lacks depth and variety and a painter without a clue where to begin? Again, those fears for my liver deepen.

Before I send you off to try and enjoy your Easter, I leave you with the observation of my six year old daughter (soon to be seven!) who watched the first half with me as we sat side by side on the couch with a laptop balanced on my knee. She asked me, this veteran player of two youth campaigns that more resemble rugby than soccer, "Daddy, they don't know what to do, do they?" 

From the mouths of babes, my friends. Mouths of babes.

Ugh.

I Want To Believe

So I watched the first 65 minutes or so of the RSL-Houston game last night, and you know what I saw? A paucity of good chances fashioned? Yeah. A game played at a frenetic pace that pretty much ignored midfield for direct play and featured unforced turnovers by the metric assload? Yeah, there was that. Jair Marrufo with a whistle again? WTF? Well, El Hunchbacko is back in Mexico and MLS has bigger fish to fry at the moment, so...

No. The thing that really bothered me as a DC United fan was watching two teams that knew what the hell they were doing in possession. Okay, so they didn't connect on all, hell most, of their passes. Sure, there was much more that was athletic than aesthetic. And the number of wasted possessions was criminal. But that ignores the fact that both teams played largely one and two-touch soccer and nobody looked at a loss about what to do with the rock at their feet. They had a plan. Runners were moving off the ball and the guys in possession knew where to put the ball to find those runners. And they played with desire.

That's not down to the quality of the players. That's the product of teamwork and confidence and a sense of clarity about the mission. That's down, in my opinion, to a firm hand on the rudder, a coach (and assorted staff) who knows how and why he wants to play a certain style and has the ability to instill that knowledge and belief in his players.

And that made the game doubly painful to watch. At times you'd be forgiven for thinking this was Charles Reep's wet dream, at others a breakneck pace suffered for the sheer exultation in speed for the sake of speed. It was unlovely. But it was also directed unloveliness, a product of leadership and motivation and, dare I say it, a plan.

I saw indications in the pre-season that we were starting to make ourselves hard to beat. I even saw some stretches in the Carolina Challenge Cup where we actually resembled at team rather than an assortment of individuals waiting for somebody else to make something happen on offense. Screw the fact that we're down some key cogs. The Revs are missing bigger chunks.

C'mon, Curt. C'mon, United. Impress me. Make me believe.